Bringing the Darkness into the Light of Awareness

Shadow Work in the Chopra Coaching methodology

Radical self-acceptance is one of the 10 Principles of Burning Man. (Which, even if you’re not a “burner”, is a great set of rules to live by.) It is also the way to having more compassion for others and changing the world for the better.

Shadow work is one of those things that sounds scary, and definitely can be a challenging and emotionally draining endeavor, however it is absolutely worth it, and when you get to the bottom of what it is you’ve been rejecting, you suddenly find you have a lot less anger and resentment toward other people, and yourself.

At least, that is what I have found in my experience using the Chopra Coaching version of Shadow work. In the Chopra methodology, you list as many people, or groups of people, that you judge to explore the unconscious. This is courageous work that requires self-compassion and a safe space where you can explore both the light and the dark.

Photo by Syed Ahmad on Unsplash

So, let’s say for example, you judge your partner for being needy. Perhaps you are a chronic caretaker of others, and the shadow side of that is that you are unwilling to ask for and accept support when you need it yourself. Your fierce independence might create this judgment, and when you start to realize this, you might judge yourself for judging your partner! No need for that, but it is the time to investigate now that you have this conscious awareness.

“As you see yourself more completely, you will have compassion for your faults, and that will lead to complete self-acceptance.” ~Deepak Chopra

You might be reading this and are unable to come up with anyone you might judge. And that’s ok; you might just have a shadow hibernating, waiting for the next trigger. Or you’re not mindful of your own thoughts or emotions and the judgments are subconscious. Your ego might be attached to a perceived identity of yourself as a good, spiritual, or moral person and so you’re not ready to expand from niceness to wholeness, or it might be protecting you from something your subconscious perceives as painful.

Photo by Rene Böhmer on Unsplash

My own shadow journey had this same resistance, and I couldn’t do it on my own. Luckily for me, as a Chopra Coach in training, I had a team of cohorts willing and able to help me work through the process and hold space for my vulnerability. I mostly identified with the “I’m too nice” version of not being ready to bring light to my shadow. For me this “niceness” looks like not speaking my truth, smiling and saying yes when I really want to say no and cry, not having strong boundaries, taking on too much so no one else has to, and generally overdoing it when I probably just need to rest.